What Every Sibling and Parent Needs to Know About Getting Along

  I recently did this shared this speech in at a speech and debate tournament. I didn’t get to the next level but I learned a lot. I made some new friends. I got to here some awesome speeches. Last but not least I learned what I can fix. 

  Maybe your kid’s fight, a lot. Maybe you fight with your sibling’s, a lot. My brother and I used to fight, a lot. Mom was fed up with us. She had a friend who gave her some advice on what to do. Mom  was going to do something drastic.

 

  I always hear kids talking about how their siblings are weird, and embarrassing, and annoying. Well I got some news for you! You can be weird, and embarrassing, and annoying! I totally get it my brother once recited the Jabberwocky, a Lewis Carroll Poem, in Harbor Freight and I had no choice, but to walk to a different aisle and pretend I didn’t know who he was. As embarrassing as that was, I still love him. The more you love and care for your siblings, the easier it will become to put up with some of their embarrassing acts. Not all, just some. For example, my family was at the zoo. Now my little brother is three and a half, and has finally learned to pee by himself. At our house, we have a 7 foot privacy fence. So he goes out there. At the zoo I looked over and, lo and behold, I saw a full moon in the middle of the day. Thankfully, there were only 13 people standing next to us. But because they were a big home school family, and I was used to such intolerable acts, and I am also used to not starting wars over them, I was able to walk away with my little brother, and not be overly embarrassed. Later we even played tag at the park with that family, and I felt fine.

 

  Siblings are people too, and we as siblings need to start appreciating them for that! They are special, and the sooner we admit that the better. I have a T shirt that says it perfectly, “weird is a side effect of awesome”. When you stop and look at your sibling they may not look like much.  They may even have orange juice dripping from their face, and Cheerios around their mouth. but when you look closely they are incredible. You may be wondering what I’m talking about. Maybe you have tried to spend time with them and see who they are. Maybe you asked them what they wanted to do, and they said, I would like to call you names. Here is something to take into consideration, would you want to spend time with someone who had always said, they didn’t like you? So here’s a  tip from me, the semi expert, oldest of 5.

 

    Show your siblings, or any one else you don’t always get along with they can trust you.

How do you show them they can trust you? For one thing, don’t call them names like, stupid, monkeyface or booger breath. For all I know, they may have gotten all the names they call you, from you. If you are an older sibling like me, you also need to think about how bossy you are being. I can say, I am pretty bossy, but I’m trying, to get better. Hint hint, I let my siblings know, I’m not perfect, and I never will be, but I care about our relationship. If you are a younger sibling, try to be obedient. I can tell you that from my perspective, I think it would be easier, to be less bossy, if my siblings obeyed. Once my little sister wasn’t listening much. Mom had another great idea, but this time it wasn’t me getting in trouble. My little sister had been disobedient, not me. Mom, said she would be my personal servant for the day if she disobeyed. Sure enough, I got my very own servant for the day. I wasn’t too hard on her  when she did what I said, but when she didn’t, I had her do dishes. Occasionally I would ask her to do something random, to see if she was learning her lesson. Not surprisingly, she has become more obedient.

 

   Maybe you do have a sibling that wants to hang out with you, but you can’t seem to find time. Maybe your little brother or sister comes to you, and asks to spend time. Sometimes you have to say, “Later,  I’m sorry but I can’t right now”. I am not an angel, in other words, I don’t always spend enough time with my sister. But I am trying to make her feel special. I’m learning to be there when she needs me, and say, “You’re alright”, when she’s a drama queen. A while back, she found a butterfly freezing to death. We took care of it, but when it warmed up outside  and we had to let it go, (that way It could still migrate), she sobbed her eyes out. Even when we hug bombed her, she still cried. So, I asked her, “Would you like to pray for it?” I held her hands and prayed for the butterfly. In a few minutes, she was the same peppy princess she usually is. It’s the little things that count. According to a missionary at a Revival I recently went to, ‘’If you have a lot, share a lot. If you have a little, share a little. But whatever you do, share.’’

 

 We have all heard that saying, sharing is caring. Well… The most important part of your relationship is actually caring. I have tried to do those 30 day challenges, where everyday you tell your sibling another way that they are special to you, but those don’t work for me. I forget and remember, 30 days later. Maybe you do things like that, and that’s great,  but what helps me the most is just plain love. Also, you kind of have to try. You aren’t going to just love your sibling, and in the first day see results. Your sibling, or for that matter anyone you don’t always get along with, is like a garden. You plant a seed of love. For fertilizer, you show actions, and you water that with more love and a pinch of effort. The fertilizer is actions. Actions include, painting nails, reading aloud, tucking  into bed, losing games in order to include the younger children, giving a head massage when their head hurts, and sharing your snacks. If you are an adult the list is different. Your list probably includes things like bringing a meal over to you friend who just went through a lot, that sort of thing. This may seem silly, but what makes you know someone loves you? Their actions of course. The water is even more love. Don’t be all lovey-dovey either, your siblings might have a panic attack, and then where would you be? At the emergency room.  According to John 3:16, God so loved the world, that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him, should not perish, but have eternal life.

 

 God loves your siblings. So should you. God loves you. So should your siblings. God intended for siblings to be each other’s best friends. Yes, we are going to fight. Yes, they are strange. Yes, we love them anyways. I mean, this is the only time in your life that you will ever get to be constantly with your siblings. Some of you have already experienced siblings moving away. If you are a kid with siblings, now is the time to make your relationship strong, to take action! Your siblings can be your best friends! Love them!

 

 Another thing to take into consideration is the fact that if you learn to get along with people now, your life will be easier. At work, you have to get along in order to have a smooth day. So weather you are an adult, a kid with siblings, or an only child, love the difficult people in your life.  If you are an adult this applies to all those frustrating coworkers. Also you can help your kids work out there difficulties. If you are an only child this applies to your cousins and friends. After all we are all familie in Christ.

 

 I am asking you to do something hard, yet so simple. That is, love the difficult people in your life and try to improve your relationship with them. It will be hard to appreciate them when they embarrass you, but I have confidence in you. You will never be perfect, but you will get better.

 

 Let’s do a review. 1st ,Yes, you are embarrassing too. So next time you get mad that your sibling decided to walk on the table that you and your friends were playing a board game on, remember that. 2nd, Appreciate your siblings and try to find what is unique about them. 3rd, Be trustworthy. How worthy are you of your siblings trust? 4th ,the little things really do count! Don’t, be distracted, by trying to do to many  big things. 5th Love, Love, Love. 6th Love will help you, in your future.

 

I started by talking about mom and her drastic idea, and that was… I had to hold hands with my brother, for 30 minutes, every time we fought. And then, we had to pray together, and then we had to do, the I Love You Dance, I know you’re wondering what, the I Love You dance  is, but dare we go into that dark part of my history? Okay, basically, you have to dance around in circles while holding hands, and shouting I love you, then you have to hug and shout, really loud. Side note, the holding hands trick only works on certain kids. The I love you dance, works on almost everyone.

 

Citations

Shannon Hopkins at May First Baptist Church 2018 Revival meeting. “If you have a lot, share a lot. If you have a little, share a little. But whatever you do, share.”

 

John 3:16 King James Version “God so loved the world,  that he gave his only begotten Son, that whosoever believeth in him, should not perish, but have eternal life.

I got my picture from pexles.com.